Saturday, May 10, 2008

Love Truth No. 4: Unrequited Love

Worse than the total agony of being in love? (One of the best lines in a movie filled with amazing lines)

"The greatest thing you’ll ever learn, is just to love, and be loved, in return.” Moulin Rouge

The worst part about the initial phases of love is when, in finding the person that you love, and, well, simply, they just don’t like you back.

And worse than that:-

i) if you are prone to being hurt by rejection (ie. you are emo) then this will hurt just a little short of childbirth.

ii) you suddenly become more fascinated by the person, or they suddenly achieve the status of a god/dess just by the simple fact that they have become unattainable.

All good stalkers start right here in ii). So get out all your hooded jumpers, bring out the tent to camp outside the house of the person you love, get ready to stick multiple pictures that you’ve taken of them secretly all over your bedroom walls and practice your heavy breathing over the phone, ladies and gentlemen, because this obsession is just about to kick in!

By virtue of the Marxism of love, there is what we call a spiral.

You love someone, and

i) they reject you
ii) they become all the more attractive for rejecting you
iii) you try harder to approach them
iv) which makes them dislike you more and reject you further
v) which makes them even more attractive
vi) which makes you try even harder
vii) which makes them call the cops
viii) which causes them to put a restraining order on you
ix) which means that by law you are not allowed within 2 km of the person
x) which makes them even so much more attractive….

Hahaha! Oh, how foolish is the heart!

I speak for all the bleeding hearts in this world when I say that nothing hurts like the pain of unrequited love, and I know that all of you would have experienced it at one stage or another. You are not alone in your grief, and as the wonderful cliché goes, time will heal all things.

Now if you will excuse me, I’ve got some heavy breathing to practise.

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