Watching Bad Movies (So You Don't Have To)

You can thank me now for saving your hard-earned/saved $16: Don't watch this movie.

Uh, uh, uh.... is that protest I hear from your lips? No.

Don't watch this movie.



The tag line for the new poster reads: Don't Look For An Answer. It's Already Too Late.

Unfortunately, in invisible ink was the third and fourth lines to that tag phrase: You've Already Paid For The Movie. It's Not Refundable.

For the man who brought us The Sixth Sense (classic), Unbreakable (I really liked it), Signs (okay, not my favourite but still watchable) and Village (not bad), he has brought us some duds like Lady in the Water and this latest effort (I'm sorry, what's the opposite of effort?) The Happening.

I should have known it. With a title like "The Happening". Badly written, badly directed, and ununderstandable (yes, it deserves a new word. Or maybe the two negatives cancel out and it becomes derstandable.), this movie makes Dude, Where's My Car? look like Memento.

It is scary in parts but mostly lazy, and even the quality of the film made Sunday afternoon television movies look like big budget productions. The acting was poor, undermined by a script that was incoherent and unbelievable.

And the big twist at the end? You find out...



... that you actually paid sixteen dollars to watch this.

Somewhere far away in Hollywoodland, Mr. Shyamalan is laughing.

At one point, he was tipped to direct The Life of Pi. Don't you dare, Mr. Shyamalan.