On The First Day Of Christmas

We woke up at about 10.00 am the next morning, because we got home about 3.00 am the night before, and went to bed at probably about 4.00 am. We had done the silly thing of driving to Heidelberg to see the Christmas decorations people put up outside their house.

Note to self for next year:
1. Don't do it again.
2. No one can afford Christmas decorations. Everyone's saving their money for the Boxing Day sales.
3. It's 2 a.m. They've switched off their decorations, silly. Haven't you heard of global warming?

So it was 10.00 am on Christmas day, and we decided to drive somewhere on the spur of the moment. We flipped open the Melway, took out a pin, closed our eyes, and randomly stabbed a hole on the appointed page. The hole said Lorne.

(Okay, so we decided on Lorne after some discussion. But a hole in the Melway sounds cooler.)

We started grabbing at leftover snacks in the house, and made our way to my brother's car. We decided that we were going to do the Great Ocean Road in style.

Malaysian style, that is. Fill that empty plastic Coke bottle with boil(ing)ed water, causing the plastic to cave in. Pack that four day old bread with the meat floss. Grab the biscuits from the pantry - but only the opened packets! What's that left over in the fridge? It's coming with us!

We stopped by a Shell station on our way out, and I ran down to the IgA nearby which was, surprisingly, open, and bought proper snacks - Doritos, Tim Tams and meat pies. Mum looked at me like I was turning Aussie (which I was, mate. Gotta love the meat pies, crikey!).

It was a beautiful drive all the way through to Geelong. The mournful rain of the days leading up to Christmas and Christmas Eve was quickly forgotten in the bright sunshine and clouds borrowed straight out from the opening sequence of the Simpsons.

The Great Ocean Road has never failed to capture my imagination every time that I have had the pleasure of driving on it - endless roads snaking into forever, revealing around each corner a sight more breathtaking than the last - green hillsides with quaint little houses strewn among the grassfields giving way to the awe-inspiring sight of the majestic sea, a silent, eternal witness to all the changes throughout the years around these coastlines.

We spent most of the time driving in the car, but we stopped at all the scenic sights to take pictures, and my brother and I had this silent competition between us to see who could take the best shots.

Ladies and gentlemen, for your judging pleasure tonight:

My brother's


Mine's (yeah, I know.)


and Mum decided to join in:



Okay, ladies and gentlemen, those among you with a photogenic eye will come to the conclusion


that my Mum's the rightful winner.

The pictures only capture a snapshot of the fun we had that day! I did not manage to photograph my shoe which got wet by the seawater when my brother insisted 'Touch the water, HK! Touch the water!' or how smooth the sand felt to touch, or how my brother overturned the sticky date pudding into his precious car! Haha!

It was a really fun day in the sun, but unfortunately we had to rush home as I had to attend a Christmas party organised at my church pastor's house. It was quite a rush to get there, I was an hour late, and I was in charge of the drinks along with this other guy.(Thankfully there were others there to cover my multitude of sins.)

The party turned really fun when we got to the Kriss Kringle bit - it was a Kriss Kringle with a twist: You got your presents in sequence, and opened it up there and then. The person who gets a gift later has the option of swapping his unopened gift for any of the other opened gifts.

I was one present away from getting a cool gift for the first time in my life - a Kathmandu wallet - when the person who picked the last unopened gift was the guy who was in charge of the drinks with me. He looked at me with an evil smile, and said 'My, HK has kept pretty quiet the whole night, ah, and I would looove a Kathmandu wallet!'

Anyway, I ended up with this instead:
Brokeback HK.

What would I want with a fluorescent pink cowboy hat, I ask you?

Sigh, well, there's always next Christmas.

'Twas the Night Before Christmas

This has been the busiest Christmas ever!

Santa's Dating Services: 29 year old Chinese male, organises parties, wears funny hats and uses his powers for organising evil games.

It all started on Christmas Eve with the party that was organised by my brother. Understandably, there were a lot of new people there at the party, so it was a little awkward at first, but then the party soon warmed right up when we started playing the games that he had so painstakingly prepared. Remember musical parcels? You know, the one you played with your kindergarten friends (Hi, Lai Yee.) or at little kiddy birthday parties?

Yup, imagine sixteen full grown adults being made to do things like sing "Old McDonald had a farm, ee ai ee ai oh, and on his farm he had a giraffe...."or meow to the tune of Three Blind Mice, and you would have a rough idea of the fun silliness that went on that night!

We also had fun with a carolling game (I still carry the blister from playing the guitar ever so violently) and also with charades/pictionary. It's nice to bring out the inner child once in a while (mine is an outer child).

We discovered the most fun thing ever - the Nintendo Wii! (It's as fun as it sounds!) It was a great virtual workout as we battled each other in bowling, shooting, boxing and also cow racing!

(Yes, you heard it right - it was quite a mooving experience!)

...

(The lame brigade called, and would like their joke back please).

Wii are family: My mother attempting the Wii after much coaxing. Tim has his game face on, and thrashed Mummy comprehensively.

All in all it was a really fun Christmas Eve night, topped off with wonderful food and robust Christmas carolling and celebratory drinks... fun!! Huge kudos to my brother for organising it with the help of Shaun, Doreen and Tim!

One Big Happy: Smiles all around after the games. You should've seen us during the games. If you look closely you might spot scratch marks/trails of blood on most of us.

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas Now...

My hands are sore from attempting all these Christmas carols for the party tomorrow! Whoever wrote "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" was not a guitarist, otherwise he would have given up halfway through the song!

(/scene)

Hark! The herald (change chord) angels sing,
(change chord) Glory to the (change chord) new (change chord) born (change chord) king!
Peace on (change chord) earth and mer (change chord) cy (change chord) mild,
(change chord!?!) God and sinners re (change chord!!) con(change chord!!!)ciled
Joyful all ye na (CHANGE CHORD!!!)

(CHANGE SONG!!!)

Hark these hands are now aching,
I'm going to give up songwriting.

(Gives up songwriting profession and becomes a potato farmer instead.)

(/end scene)

Thankfully he didn't give up, and we have the wonderful carols we have with us today.

Christmas always sends a warm feeling in my heart. Sure, I have spent most of my Christmases at home along the Equator where the only white Christmases we had was if the haze was bad enough! But here's the KL equivalent of a Christmas:

Driving in the dark of your car through KL at night, the city somehow more vibrant than usual - Bintang Walk decorated with bright yellow lit starshaped lamps, with ribbons of red and green lights adorning the streetlamps. Revellers thronging the streets, and you never really felt unsafe despite the swelling crowds. The soft croon of Frank Sinatra in the background wishing all kids from one to ninety two a Merry Little Christmas now.

This year I believe that I am way more Christmassed than I have been in previous years because:

1) I have now lost use of my left hand because I have been attempting to play Christmas Carols. I can now only pick my nose with my right hand. On the plus side, I have learnt how to play "Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire" and "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas Now" apart from all the Christian goldies.

2) I have bought a Christmas compilation CD! Tacky, I know, but it has Boyz II Men's Silent Night and Mariah Carey's reverent earpiercing "O Holy Night!". PS. Mariah Carey's Merry Christmas album - best Christmas album of all time. True.

3) I have seen one Christmas related movie! It's Surviving Christmas, with Ben Affleck and James Gandolfini - pretty cheesy but a fun watch, and there's one great truth learnt - some people would pay huge amounts of money to have family around them at Christmas but others take it for granted.

Ben Affleck (smiling wanly) to James Gandolfini: 'Nothing. It's just ironic. I paid all that money to be part of your family. You're giving it away for nothing.'

4) I am attending not one, not four, but two Christmas parties.

5) I have wrapped not one, not three, but two Christmas Kriss Kringle presents. I have decided that I love wrapping things.

Yo, Christmas' cool, it's the greatest season,
I'm no fool, I know He's the reason.
They say it's Santa and his ho, ho, ho,
I look at them, and say I don't think so,
I love the season and it ain't no lie,
My saviour's born, I will testify.
Word.

(Wrapping, you fool. Not rapping.)

(Oh.)

Anyways, to all of you who follow me on my journey- both far and near- have a blessed little Christmas now.

P.S. Grace, wishing you were here with us. Soon, yeah, dear?

12 Days of Christmas

One of my favourite Christmas songs reworked wickedly! This is so wrong, yet so hahahaha...!

Seven... eleven workers! Brilliant!

An early Christmas wish to everyone... I'm certainly dreaming of a wet Christmas here in Melbourne!

Think the lotus, feel the lotus, drive the Lotus!

"Let's Get It On...."

Mum's here! There's going to be lots of places to see and visit with her, and lots of restaurants to be tried and shops to be shopped at! It must be that time of the year in Melbourne, I think, because I have bumped into so many friends and their families just yesterday alone.

I have just got off two tiring fourteen hour night shifts at the hospital, but I seem to be getting by with little random snatches of sleep instead of needing straight runs of it now. I must be growing (old) up.

This has been my little companion for the last week:


and I must say that it is one of the better reads I have had. It's a look at a 35 year old record store owner in a this-doesn't-look-like-the-movies relationship, which makes me cringe sometimes at how realistically flawed he is, but how we all figure things out for ourselves in the end. A good book for this stage in my life!

I have to watch the movie now! (Jack Black makes the perfect Barry!)

One of the signature lines in the book is all about lists, so here goes:

Top 5 reads of all times (so far):

1. Jodi Picoult's My Sister's Keeper. I have A to thank for this book, a really well written thinking piece on the issues surrounding having one child just to keep another alive. I promise to return it to you one day!

2. Any of the books of Alexander McCall Smith in the No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency Series. I am a really big fan of this series, and the characters are vividly depicted in my mind already. All I need is to pull them out of my mind whenever I pick up one of these books, and I am lost once again amongst the open spaces of Botswana with the limitless sky above. I love how it injects hope and pride in Botswana, in an Africa which is oftentimes torn and hope-less.

3. Heavenly Man by Brother Yun and Paul Hattaway. I remember sitting in a room, tears inexplicably streaming from my face as I read this book. A life changing read.

4. Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress by Dai Sijie. Finished reading it in one sitting, and watched the movie as well. Both are excellent!

5. Nick Hornby's High Fidelity. As above. Love in all its neurosis and imperfections. But love anyway, in the end.

Some of you have read this list and stopped reading after No.1. ('What? Jodi Picoult? You sell-out!') and I don't blame you! And I know that this list is probably far from perfect (ie. I would highly recommend 'I Love You, Beth Cooper' by Larry Doyle which reads like a teenage movie) but that's my list for now, and I would openly welcome any further recommendations.

' I've been thinking with my guts since I was fourteen years old, and frankly speaking, between you and me, I have come to the conclusion that my guts have sh*t for brains.'
- Rob Fleming, High Fidelity -

Haha!

In My Life 1: The Love Of CHK

'Her name is Lai Yee. Chan Lai Yee.

I like her. She doesn't wear earrings, her hair is curly and tied up in two little bunches, em... she's pretty.

Do you want to come on a date? To a romantic dinner?

No, I keep it a secret.

I don't want the whole world to know!

Because everybody will laugh at me.

She doesn't like me.'

Unfortunately I don't get to do the surprised little smile at the end and then walk her by her tiny hands into the sunset.

Ah, what a beautiful little ad! Once more, thumbs up to Yasmin Ahmad for playing Cupid to the innocent love between two little kids! I can just see little Hong Ming during recess on his 'romantic dinner' with Umi!

My first crush would have been in kindergarten, I think. (yes, I started young!) (eee... hamsap!) She was the cutest girl in the class and really bright for her age. She had naturally curly hair which was tied up in two bunches and she had sweet brown skin from her mixed parentage.

We were never officially together (ha ha!) but we used to do things together all the time - playing together, talking about nothing in particular in a way that six year olds do, and also exchanging those Padini Smurf stickers (does anyone remember them at all?).

The problem with kindergarten is that when it ends, you pretty much go on your own separate ways - everyone heads on to a different primary school, and we were a bunch of underprivileged six year olds back then - no handphones, no MSN messenger and we couldn't exchange Facebook details at all.

We met again six years later - I was going for the first time in my life to a local tuition class to brush up on my BM (Saya masih tidak petah bercakap dalam Bahasa Melayu, dan walaupun saya pergi ke kelas tuisyen selama enam bulan, saya hanya berjaya mendapat gred B sahaja dalam karangan untuk UPSR). It was a class of about twenty students, and I entered midway through the year.

I was the awkward outsider, polite to my classmates without making friends, and I usually sat by myself at the back of the class. She was also in the class, although she had grown up in the interim of the six years that I hadn't seen her. It wasn't until the teacher called her name out in class one day that I recognised her.

You would have thought at this point that I would have walked up to her and said 'Hi, remember me?' but I was not quite the charmer I am now. (And not nearly as modest.)

I think she recognised me too - I might be going out on a limb here - but I think she started dressing up to come to tuition class after I started coming. Being the twelve year olds with awkward social graces that we were, unfortunately, we never said 'Hi' to each other in those six months.

I never returned to the tuition class after my UPSR year and once again we parted ways - this time for good.

There has been an interim of fifteen years now, but Lai Yee, if there's any chance that you've googled yourself and stumbled upon this blog - I'm sorry, and well, hi.

The love of Tan Hong Ming

Kudos to Yasmin Ahmad again, not only for teaching us lessons about ourselves, but also for making Tan Hong Ming the luckiest seven year old in Malaysia!